Over the last few days, I have been reflecting quite profoundly on the meaning of Life and Death. As I am still part of a research project conducted by the Institute for the Study of Peak States, which is separate but complementary from my own research on Ultimate Happiness, I am a guinea pig for an experiment that will happen within a very short time from the writing of this article.
I have volunteered for this experiment 16 months ago, and as I am the canary in the coal mine for this experiment, there is a risk of either being propelled into an even better peak state, or dying. Research on consciousness can help humanity on a global level but can be just as risky as the pioneers who discovered a new continent without knowing what was waiting for them. It is one of the ways that I chose to make a difference in the world. Hence why I am reflecting on Life and Death today. And here are my thoughts at the moment.
I used to fear Death more than anything in the world, but since I found myself on the portal of Death 14 months ago, my opinion of what Death and Life mean to me has completely changed. The realization and embodiment that the acceptance of Death is the prerequisite for the acceptance of Life has brought me an immense feeling of freedom. When I faced the portal of Death, which I now call the portal of Life, I understood that the purpose of our lives is to reconnect with our essence, hopefully before having to physically die so we can show other people how to do the same.
We cannot know what Life really is until we align ourselves fully with our Life Purpose every moment of every day. Acceptance of Death, and therefore Life, and everything in between, has drawn me to take full responsibility for myself and everything I do. It is a true state of connectedness where the ego is left behind and our essence is allowed to shine, and from there we can start to make a difference in the world.
In the moment where I totally and unconditionally accepted Death, I simultaneously accepted Life and found Ultimate Happiness. I realized that the only possible way to suffer is being separated from my essence, my Life Purpose. The only thing separating us from our essence is our ego, which is an accumulation of blockages and issues we identify with and feel like us, but are not us. I realized that the fear of Death is actually the fear of losing our ego, what we know ourselves as. All fears are fears of the ego. Our true self has no fear. In our essence, we do not fear anything. We accept everything with equal Joy.
On April 11, 2009, this is what has happened to me. I died without physically dying when I consciously and unconsciously decided from every fiber of my being to accept Death totally and unconditionally. And no, I was not suicidal and have never been. But I realized that fighting Death was in fact fighting the reconnection with my true self. So I let it happen, sitting on the beach on a beautiful Easter morning. This was the first day of my life. This is how I found Ultimate Happiness.
Here is what I feel now. It is only by letting go completely of my ego that I can reconnect with my essence. This means that I have to allow my ego to die in order to live. Of course, we want to be able to do that without having to die physically. This is my mission: show everyone how to find Life without having to die physically. This is the reason why I wrote my book, Beyond the Rollercoaster.
Over the last few days my reflections have brought me to accept Death as well as Life with equal Joy. I now know how to live in my essence, my soul, the part of me that is timeless and infinite. I have the absolute certainty that I will continue living my Life Purpose whether my body is physically alive or six-foot underground. There is no fear of anything anymore. Everything is possible from here, I can create my entire existence. This is a powerfully empowering place to be.
I am now fully accepting of what is, was and will be with equal peace and serenity. My body has very little importance in the big scheme of things, and I honor it as the vehicle that has giving me the opportunity to find the Ultimate Happiness I have been obsessively searching for over 26 years. No matter what happens today or in the new few years, I know that my essence lives on. I know WHO I AM at the core of my being. I know that I am eternal and infinite. And so are you.